4.11.11

I don't have to do anything

the radio was playing in the corner and you felt like laughing.
it was a sad laugh, and you let it out.
it may seem to you that all our lives are scripted, that the water's cold, and that no one-thing is not like another. You have tried to express this, but your friends were confused by the double negative.


This was all in the days when i wore Tee-shirts and for a long time, i thought you had to finish a book when you started it.

when people tell me now: 'oh, you didn't have to do that.' or 'don't feel like you need to . . .'

It sounds silly, so i let them know 'I dont have to do anything.' There's a freedom there, and don't let anyone devalue your freedom by calling your choices perfunctory. You could choose to sit in the rain, but you don't. You could try to get a job, or you could change your room to look like mine.

I got a post card from my kid sister. She's not a kid. She's my favorite. It read:

Bro,
do you remember when we were siblings, and lived in the same house,
and you would flail your arms in an attempt to dance?
You're right, by the way. I followed my dream, and i got to Hawaii,
and of that I am proud. Thank you.
I miss you everyday,
Sis.



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